Tony LaRussa's DUI

On the morning of March 22, 2007, St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony LaRussa was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving. Cops in Jupiter, Florida found Tony asleep at the wheel while stopped an intersection with his foot on the brake and his car in drive. Naturally, being the worst fans in baseball, he was given a standing ovation upon his return to the club, that same day.

In the past, the atmosphere at Cardinals games has jokingly been compared to Maybury; I remember one Cardinal game where David Eckstein received rousing applause for "having a good at bat" (which ending with him grounding out). Stupid as it may be (and it is borderline retarded), cheering blindly for anything your team does is one thing; cheering for a criminal the same day he was arrested is another.

One thing that has always bothered me about Cardinals fans is that they aren't really fans. A fan actually gets frustrated from time to time and boos occasionally, when the performance on the field warrants it. Cardinal fans cheer regardless of what's happening, and then act like they're better fans for it. I'm sorry, but just because you're too stupid to do anything but clap doesn't make you better fans. Case in point, Cardinal fans rarely boo the other team. What is this, a fucking tee ball game?

Anyway, cheering for a criminal is wrong. Standing and cheering for a criminal is pretty fucking ridiculous. Honestly, just when I think I can't hate the Cardinals or their fans any more, I hear about something stupid like this. Christ, and to think we still have six more months of hearing about their bullshit World Series win (which I'm sure I'll write about at length...here's a preview...they got fucking lucky and if they had played in a halfway decent division they never would have made the playoffs). And don't even get me started on LaRussa, who's one of the most overrated managers of the last 2 decades.

There was an interesting (yet largely unnoticed) article in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch which compared LaRussa's situation to Leonard Little a defensive end for the Rams, who in 1998 drove drunk, crashed, and killed another motorist. The article points out that LaRussa only avoided a similar fate by sheer luck. . . his foot just as easily could have slipped off the brake, hitting a car in the intersection.

Take a look at this article on stltoday.com, particularly the first and third idiots who write in a defend LaRussa. The first asshole writes in to say that he would "bet his life savings" that LaRussa regrets his mistake and will never do it again, because Tony is such a "good person." Are you serious? Do you know Tony LaRussa? How the hell do you know that he's a good person? The third guy is all over the place. First, he defends LaRussa because he was only slightly over the legal limit (more on that in a second), which wouldn't have been a crime in Missouri 6 years ago, before the limit was lowered. Good point, douche bag. Slavery wasn't a crime in Missouri 150 years ago either. Keep making excuses for him. Then he writes about how lucky St. Louis is to have LaRussa as a coach and how he's not as bad as Bush or Cheney. No, seriously that's what he wrote. I'm amazed a guy that stupid can even write.

As the espn.com article details, LaRussa blew a .093, which is just slightly above the legal limit of .08. My question is, what kind of pussy passes out at the wheel with a .093? What is that, like 3 beers? If you pass out after 3 beers (or in his case a couple glasses of wine), maybe you shouldn't drink in the first place Tony.